Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Don't Pass the Hot Potatoe - and cows

I sometimes leave a sweater (or two) inside my car. And maybe a few other things such as a hat or glasses (yes, I admit it, I am guilty!). Since my car is a Mini, the boys need to move my stuff to have room for themselves. P complained today that N would frequently move my stuff from his seat to P's. N argued he needed to move my stuff to seat down. I acknowledged the situation and asked how else they could deal with it so that instead of making it someone else's problem they would actually solve the problem. P suggested calling me to come move my stuff. I said that wasn't a great approach as they sometimes got to the car before I was anywhere near. A then said that when he found my stuff on his seat he would put glasses and hats where he knew I moved them to (the glove compartment) and sweaters on my seat for me to deal with. I agreed that was a good approach: he was solving the problems he could and passing those he couldn't to someone who could, i.e., me.

We are frequently in similar situations in which the easiest thing to do is to transfer our problem to someone else. That is rarely the right approach. If you can you should solve the problems rather than move them around. And if you can't solve them, at least move them to someone who can.

What about the cows? Ask N. He claims that is what we spoke about!

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